time measurement theory

1/26
Just realized in a discussion with myself why time can move strangely to us. At least, it's a theory anyway. It came to when thinking about how it's been 5 weeks since being with ex, and how it feels both long and short ago. My routine was completely altered, and I've been doing new things with new friends. Previous to 5 weeks, I'd pass time thinking about or being with my ex. My time was measured by events relative to him, and a different pace. As I've been centered around community at church, and my Latin teaching, and my fasting & prayer every morning, I am still adjusting to these new routines and how I am using my time. I don't have old checkpoints of seeing/speaking to him. But I think it's deeper than that - I no longer have the emotional checkpoints, the same dip and peak pattern that had become normal. Life is more mellow now. I certainly do feel very down, or very anxious, yet the thoughts don't linger or return in the same way as they did. The only echo is my loneliness, yet that has always been there. My point, to clarify - we don't really measure time in terms of dates and numbers, but emotional and habitual states.

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